Getting Back in The Saddle

I went from Friday, feeling oh-so-normal and comfortable in my own skin, to Saturday afternoon, dealing with the druthers of aging, constantly cleaning, driving a minivan and penciling in when to make mad, passionate love to my husband -- oh, not to mention, its probably behind the locked doors of our Master Bedroom as opposed to some glamorous European Bed & Breakfast... it wasn't until Sunday that I realized my lethargy and lack of motivation was due to a very subtle bout of depression that had settled on me over the course of the past 24-48 hours.

Friday evening our friends from Bellingham came down with their two girls to spend the night. Shari and I had a wonderful evening out by ourselves talking and doing some shopping together while the guys put the kids to bed at home. We mentioned to each other the oddness of still feeling like the 15-year old babysitter at heart but realizing that those same kids you babysat have now grown, married and birthed a child of their own. We were old and we were beginning to feel those feelings that we've always rolled our eyes at in others.

We made it home with little to no energy left and interrogated our husbands on the going-ons of the evening we had so wonderfully missed. We all went to bed and slept soundly, at the mercy of our offspring.

The next morning I prepared the house for a brunch with the Archers, ourselves (the Scheis) and an old friend who had recently married. Kyle, the kids and I had not met his wife as of yet and we were anxious to have them over. Then the door bell rang.

As the kids excitedly opened the door I caught a glimpse of the couple before I about tripped over my own feet. Tall, model-like, without children, and full of newly wed joy. I dug my heart out of my stomach and warmly welcomed them into my home... 'crap, they're taking their shoes off - there's dried macaroni and yesterday's apple juice still on the floor - no time to sweep this morning'. I hug and invite them into our home. They seem so regal and well-rested; so on top of the world and perfectly matched with each other; so young and energetic... so toned. No loose skin, no wrinkles, no blood shot eyes from years of trying to keep them open when all they want to do is close... just beautiful and very hydrated, if I might say so myself.

My first bullet wound came when I asked if I could interest them in a cup of coffee or a Mimosa... 'oh, no thank you, just a glass of ice water please' as I've got one of each of the aforementioned partially drunk in either hand. My eyebrows raise, I swallow my sip of coffee quickly and nod. 'of course! My apologies. I forgot that we offer that here' ... as I turn and scowl, setting my Mimosa oh-so-patiently onto the counter.

She's about 5'11" if I had to guess, blond and tone. A WHITE smile with WHITE whites of her eyes. She's witty and on top of her game. She keeps up with the guys and makes everyone laugh. She's 24 years old. I realize that while we sit there I'm staring her down like a vulture... trying to find any fault I can but finding none. She's wonderful and eloquent; she's kind-hearted and easy to have around... 'isn't there anything wrong with this girl?' Kyle asks them how they met and they tell a story just short of You've Got Mail and then after further questioning begin to disclose with us the towns they visited whilst on a 17-day cruise throughout Europe just recently.

At this point, I have nothing left. I can feel my loose skin fold over the top of my favorite jeans and my frizzy "baby hair" wisp like a halo around my face; I'm not on top of my game today due to my breast infection and clogged milk ducts and I'd be tempted to lose this party were someone tempting me with a pair of sweats and a nap.

I know that there are more important things in life. I'm fully aware of that... and today has been a good day for jumping back on the horse and getting things accomplished.

I DO love who I am and where God has me and the ins and outs of my life -- yet I do believe this is the first ever true REALITY CHECK when it came to the wear and tear of life as I've known it.

"The older you get, the more you tell it like it used to be."
-- Author Unknown